I'm not a phone-talker. In fact, there used to be frequent jokes made at my expense about my lack of ability to talk on the phone. I've tried to work on this flaw. At work, I'm usually the person to answer the phone now. I call people as part of my job. It has actually helped me become a bit more comfortable with the phone. Yet, still, after five years of living far away from many of my friends, I still procastinate about calling them..though I know the importance of keeping in touch, I'm still really bad at it.
Last night I broke my streak of non-calling. I talked to several old friends and it was so refreshing. I always forget just how important keeping in touch is to my existence.
Talking to old friends can be refreshing for many reasons: (1) they encourage me from where I am. I have a friend who is in a similar area of life. She has similar priorities, similar interests, similar concerns. She always seems to have a better attitude than I do. If I'm even tempted to complain, she always stops me without even trying. She knows where I'm coming from, appreciates my point of view, but always has great advice.
Another friend (2) knows me better than I know myself. She's been known to say things that I really take offense to. Yet, a couple days later, I find myself thinking, "the only reason that offended me was because she was exactly right." She's like family: she knows me well enough to know my strengths and weaknesses and knows how to touch that nerve that will send me over the edge. I don't think she even knows she sends me over the edge, but she does and it really makes the point hit home - and she always seems to hit that nerve, just when I need it.
Another friend (3) is always so glad to hear from me that it make me feel good to be needed...not that I think this friend is terribly needy, but it's nice to have someone who is so glad to hear from me and share what's going on there and be so interested in what's going on in my life. We don't neccesarily talk about deep life-issues, but just talking about anything is refreshing.
Another friend (4) I don't have as much in common with anymore, but I'm still happy to be friends with her. She's in a completely different situation than I could ever imagine myself in. I can't really sympathize with anything she deals with, I don't know anyone she knows, and I don't always know how to be a good friend to her, yet somehow it works.
Sometimes I'm tempted to think I'm an island and I don't really need anyone else, but just one conversation with an old friend (or a new friend, for that matter) is enough to make me realize my need for others.
Posted by at July 1, 2004 09:43 AM